ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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