Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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