he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
