i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
