How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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