I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
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