U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
