is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
