why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
