I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Do vagina's smell?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
