i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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