Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize