apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
No subtext here. People are naked.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize