For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
