singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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