i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
