You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
