McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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