I bet he comes in French.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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