I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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