i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
