I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
