Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
