Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
