i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
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