This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
