hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
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