So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
