I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
