You're a womanizer and a bitch.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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