we made out on top of his cat.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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