But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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