You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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