I think scott just propositioned me for sex
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
