singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
