can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize