Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
