I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
