he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
