After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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