Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
