I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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