I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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