She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
its not stalking. its research.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
