there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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