that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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