Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(416): View more from Ontario

you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night

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(423): View more from Tennessee

If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.

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(607): View more from New York

I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno

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(905): View more from Ontario

He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him

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