i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
