Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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