Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
