I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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