It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
